Posted on 10/16/20 4:04 PM
That's too bad that she's bringing her own issues into it instead of dealing with them on her own. You have enough on your plate without having to deal with your mother's personal issues. My mother did the same thing, when she couldn't get a boyfriend after she divorced my father she tried to turn me into her spouse. I was around your age also and didn't know what to do with it.
Posted on 10/16/20 5:20 PM
@castledepress Wait what?!? She tried to turn you into her spouse? wtf
Posted on 10/16/20 5:41 PM
Lol...it was never anything sexual or inappropriate, she just tried to get me to do things with her like go to dinner or go to the movies and such, something you would do with a boyfriend. I had my my own friends so I really wasn't interested but she tried to make me feel guilty for not hanging out with her. In psych it's called "spouseification" when you try to turn your child into a companion or in place of a love interest. I tried to get her to do some therapy since she never recovered from the divorce but she wasn't interested.
Posted on 10/16/20 6:56 PM
@castledepress Bruh, I wish I could go out with my friends, but she won't let cause she doesn't really have any friends, but I see what your saying now. I never get any guilt though from not spending time with my mom, tbh I hate being around her, matter fact I hate her. I never have any remorse or anything for her either. My dad isn't in my life because of her. She chases people out of her life and then wonders why they leave her, then she plays the victim everytime. I don't blame my dad for leaving, she says that he left because he didn't want me, but thats not true because he tried to buy me a phone so many times so I can talk to him and he would try to come see me and take me places but she would always want to come to, but she wouldn't let him because she wanted him to be in her life also. Like she is the reason why he left, he didn't want her, but shes to stupid to get that. I wish she would also stop playing the victim when shes not even a victim. When she cries all I want to do is laugh in her face (which sounds kind of harsh), but like that woman has put me through so much hell and now i'm 16 and I can't even have a phone or go to my cousin's house. MY COUSIN'S HOUSE!!!! That is just sad. I can't go outside either, so i'm stuck in that hell hole house 24/7. I can't wait to get tf away from her. I've been punished for years pretty much for god knows what.
Posted on 10/17/20 7:14 PM
You are caught in the middle of your parent's war with each other. Is there anywhere else you can go? Your mother has you under lock and key which isn't right, your need your own life and your friends. You have a lot of anger toward her but it's justified because of what she's doing to you. She also seems to be directing whatever anger she has toward your father onto you. You are unfortunately the "weak link" and she's exploiting that. You aren't of age yet, still under her roof and still under 18. Is there any way your cousin can come to you? Or that you can get a phone? You are being cut off from outside support and that isn't right. You need healthy connections just like we all do.
Posted on 10/17/20 7:39 PM
Sorry, got distracted for a change. Let me understand this, your mother won't let you have a phone? Seriously?
Posted on 10/18/20 5:15 AM
Posted on 10/18/20 5:15 AM
I had a flip phone, but she took it away, because I told my cousin "lol"
Posted on 10/18/20 5:24 AM
If I were a family therapist I would have to talk to your mother now to find out her side of the story because it seems like she's holding you hostage. She's cutting you off from the world. How are you leaving messages on this site? Are you using your own computer or someone else's?
Posted on 10/18/20 5:15 PM
@castledepress I have a school chromebook