How to manage relationships with loved ones that have a mental illness?


Patients Behavioural disorders / Mental illness

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Topic of the discussion

Posted on

Don't get me wrong, there are some sweet old men and women out there, but I'm here to tell you I just had the WORST experience of my life with my fiance's mother in law. We've been together for 3 years. Now granted, this woman has a right to have her own house, her own, privacy. Etc, etc,etc BUT, I'm here to tell you our story. She agreed to help us get off our feet so we were indebted to get like most young people do when some agree to help. We gave her cigarettes, made that woman coffee everyday, made sure she ate, and helped her when she needed it. That dirty woman hid behind her 36 diseases "Killing her all the time" and her COPD even though she's a smoker, and has degenerative alzheimers. She HID behind Battered women's syndrome and when she didn't get her way, she cried wolf. She told police my fiance was doing drugs, I was threatening her, he was abusing her when he was really sweeping the floor or putting dishes away. She called the police on us 3 times on us and they said if she does it again then she's going to jail if it was false. Then she filed a restraining oder on him because they were having a yelling match and she lost. After a while we left and stayed with two friends when she invited us back and violated her own restraining order. Now, fast forwarding in time to now, she uses her meds and lyrica to get drunk and mean to rant at us and then tell her lawyer we're the ones doing it. Where I live all if this seems perfectly normal behavior and we got told we're should accept it by police and her lawyer. My fiance even filed a mental hygiene on her should he deem her unkempt if she got too out of control because she chased us with a sword once at my fiance. Now I don't know about you guys but have any of you ever experienced this and how do you handle it because this last time she called her lawyer and made police escort me to the nearest shelter. Before they showed up she tried to have them think I wad laughing at the police and not at her and the whole time her lawyer was there and said nothing to defend me. I implore all senior lovers to think twice that not all are as nice as they might seem on the outside because this lady almost cost me my marriage too.

Beginning of the discussion - 12/3/21

How to manage relationships with loved ones that have a mental illness?

• Community manager
Posted on

Hi @KattandJam4331‍, thank you for sharing with us. That sounds like a really difficult situation to be in. Mental illness is hard, especially when it affects family through blood or marriage. Has your fiancé been able to talk to a healthcare professional about it? If her Alzheimer's or mental state is putting her or others in danger, maybe a doctor can step in.

Has anyone else been through a difficult time with a loved one with mental illness? Were they willing to accept help? Can you share any advice?

Take care,

How to manage relationships with loved ones that have a mental illness?

Posted on

Yes he signed her up for a mental hygiene if she needs one but he won't sign her up unless things get really bad. We originally were there to be health aides but the plan didn't work out. She has lupus and misuses her medicine alot and hides behind battered women's as an excuse to arrest people when she can't get her way. They are serious about that here where I live too they don't care if it's real or not. We almost got sent to jail 3 times because of her lies. And everyone thinks we are in the wrong. 

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