Eating disorder

this entire month I have been struggling with Anorexia and Bulimia. I feel like people would be better off without me. Sometimes I think “would it matter at all if I wasn’t around.” I don’t tell my boyfriend cuz I’m afraid how he will react so he has no clue about my eating disorder or depression, and one friend I wish to talk to I’m not sure I should because this friend  is going through a lot but at the same time I don’t this this person would care. At the same time I don’t want anyone to know about it so that I can take away the pain I’m feeling and it’s making me skinny. I don’t know why I am say all this but I feel alone and don’t know where else I feel safe to express this. 

@Tiffany‍ I am sorry you are struggling. Have you had anorexia or bilimia before? Do you think it stems from your depression?

@mvn481‍ 

when I was a teenager at age 18 to age 21 I did have deal with it and was in and out of hospitals and getting help. Lately I haven’t send any docs or taken any meds. Over time I struggle but lately it has gotten worse and it does stem from my depression. 

So sorry @Tiffany‍ 

I think most of us deal with some sort of eating issue when we are depressed... some people indulge and others don't eat. I don't eat.

I know there is a difference between anorexia and bulimea, but I am not sure the exact different. I wish I knew how to help, but I think the thing that helps for everything that stems from our depression symptoms is to try and control our depression. How is that going for you lately? From your posts it seems you have been having some struggling days lately, yea?

@mvn481‍ 

yeah, it’s been difficult.

Hi @Tiffany‍ how have you been lately? I hope all is well. How is your eating disorder going? The situation with your friend Red and your boyfriend?

@whatistheissue‍ 

Hey! Things with my eating disorder are a struggle. My friendship with Red is good. I think I could of been overthinking the situation; but thankfully all is good with our friendship. My boyfriend and I are great he just doesn’t know about my eating disorder and assumes I work out all the time cuz he wants to work out and lose weight so he assumes I work out but I don’t. I have tried to tell him but he doesn’t understand or has a hard time grasping as to why I am feeling depressed. I try to explain it but can  only express small feelings or certain things cuz he can’t grasp it. Maybe cuz it’s a lot for him to digest. So I’m still trying to get better some how just taking longer and harder to do on my own.