How to separate bipolar disorder from our personality?
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Hi everyone, I was diagnosed "bipolar" as a teen and every since I feel like I've lost all self-confidence, especially in my personal life.
With my high highs and low lows I don't think the same way or have the same needs anymore.
Whenever I'm feeling better I regain my self-confidence and need to feel independent. And when I'm in a depressive state I need to be taken care of.
I'm afraid that my thoughts are being driven by my disorder and that it has become my personality. I feel like I don't know who I am or what I want anymore 🙄.
Do any of you also feel like this?
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@twomes Hello twomes, thank you for starting this discussion! I think many of us can definitely understand what you're feeling, like our diagnosis has consumed us.
Hello all, how are you doing today? How to you differentiate between your disorder and your true personality? Do you consider your bipolar disorder to be separate from your personality, or are they one and the same? Feel free to share your story or experience with this here!
@Laurie7 @heidihildeman79 @christiesmith3568 @Paigesc17 @Melisa @Noah2142 @alickeys1999 @Wolfie6499 @MotherofDogs @tinahernandez0425 @laurie3jean @kaleh725 @Dingledang007 @Essence32 @Salemx333
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Courtney_J, Community Manager, Carenity US
I believe I am the same person as far as my moral standards and beliefs, but, I know they are stunted by the confusion and pain of a bipolar episode.
@twomes I understand what you mean. Bipolar can be all-consuming. But I think it's like what @kaleh725 said, you're still in there, it's just the emotions and confusion of the disease that's messing with you. Have you talked to your doctor about it?
This is a great discussion. Since I've been alone for months now I have been thinking of this. I try to think about who I am and I don't know. It doesn't help that my family treats me different since I have been diagnosed. Therefore I act like the person they think I am. Mutt mom and my sister tell me to never a decision on my own. Constantly hearing this makes me feel like I'm defined by my diagnosis. I want to learn who I am as an individual. I want to learn my purpose. So far I don't feel I have one. Sorry for dumping. This has been a very frustrating time.
I feel as if I am defined by my actions and of course what stands out is my high and lows. Others see these behaviors and think that I am like that all the time.....as if that's who I am. I don't know how to make people see the real me once they've seen the "high or low" me. Often I'm not even given a second chance. I don't want to be judged harshly but then again...maybe they don't understand and just need educated? What are your thoughts?
I feel like my highs and lows are the same as my personality. I feel as though my personality is defined by my bipolar diagnosis. It is such a part of me. It's been with me for many years and I know that I'll never be different. I have to survive my day to day life. I'm sorry if i sound like a defeated person but I'm a realist. My personality has always been highs and lows. I wished it weren't so but it is what it is.
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Mary K Rhea
I know deep down I'm a good person, however, the episodes make me come off differently to ppl.
I like Eckhardt Tolle- he teaches presence and not trusting your mind
I feel the exact same way. During the last year though I feel good then the next 5 minutes I'm terrible. Due to my diagnosis I really don't know who I am. I'm afraid to make any person bad I believe everything they think and feel. This makes it very hard to know who I am. If I tried to figure out who I'm afraid I will really get depressed. This scares me a lot.
I am struggling right now, and for the last couple of days. I missed 3 doses of propranolol somehow forgot to take morning dose fro 3 days. I’m super sensitive to meds. I also started a new treatment called Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation a week ago that happens everyday of the week. I take lithium, nortriptyline, Mirapex, and Temazepam every night. I have been an emotional rollercoaster for the last few days, and find myself sinking deeper into an agitated depression. My doctor wants to wean me off of the temazepam I take every night because it’s highly addictive and also has side effects of new or worsening depression, suicidal thoughts, nervousness, irritability, and impaired memory. All things I’ve been experiencing. But this last week, these feelings have been magnified greatly and makes me feel extremely uncomfortable and unable to focus or distract myself from thinking of self sabotaging, intense agitation, and feeling the urge to end it. Is there anyone out there that struggles with these things? If so, any thoughts on how to cope without going to the hospital? Greatly appreciate it. Thanks
@Megzy12 Hey, I hope you're feeling better. When you miss your meds it can really make your mind go places. How's the TMS going? I haven't heard of that before so I'm interested to hear about it if you're ok with sharing.
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