Topic of the discussion
Posted on 6/20/20 12:53 PM
this is painful to right so i will just right and walk away. when i was 5 years old my older brother had sex with me. i was not aware of anything that was happening at this moment in time. i have held this secret for 15 years. it is a trauma i hate feeling. I hate replaying it in my head. i only remember bits and pieces but this trauma almost killed me. i went into a deep depression because of it and barley able to make it out the other side. i am a guy so telling u this is hurts because ur told as a kid to keep ur feelings inside.
Beginning of the discussion - 6/22/20Processing childhood trauma https://www.carenity.us/forum/depression/living-with-depression/molested-2075
Posted on 6/22/20 6:39 PM
@tanner Hello tanner, thank you for your bravery in sharing your story with us. I'm so sorry to hear about what you've been through. I hope you will feel comfortable to seek support here on Carenity, or better yet from a mental health professional.
For everyone, if ever you're experiencing sexual assualt or trauma, please don't hesitate to contact the National Sexual Abuse Hotline at 800.656.HOPE (4673) to access free, confidential support in your area. You can also reach them 24/7 online at https://hotline.rainn.org/online.
Posted on 6/29/20 6:18 PM
@tanner Wow you are so brave for sharing that. I hope you'll consider talking to a professional to help you cope with that and process it. Childhood trauma doesn't just go away, it's something you carry with you for the rest of your life. I hope you're doing ok.
Posted on 6/29/20 8:27 PM
Posted on 7/2/20 2:45 PM
hi Tanner, I had a terrible childhood. I was sexually and physically abused by my own Dad. Plus an uncle and a cousin that sexually abused me. I suffer from PTSD from this. When I was nine I saw something no one should have to see. I saw my own Dad take his life and I did not know he had mental illness until I was grown. Because of this I have nightmares of them abusing me. My Dad told my Mom after she had found out he raped me he said" I did not want our daughter to go into the world inexperienced like you were when we got married." He took my innocence from me the very thing I was going to give my husband on our wedding night. Now I am 45 years old been married 2 times and have children of my own. I told myself I would protect my daughter at all costs but that did not happen cause of somethings happened and she was not in my care. After it happened she was diagnosed with severe PTSD as if someone just came home from war and I cried cause I did not protect her. As for myself I struggle with trust issues but my husband Knighthawk loves and accepts me with my faults and all. You are a brave man for coming out and talking about it. It's taken me over 30 years to talk about this and we both are strong and survivors. Tell your story and you never know somebody might just listen and it may help them cope too. Love your friendHQ