I cant remember the last time I had a good day

I have no problems crying and I do see the good things around me but sometime the scales are tipped and overwhelming. There are times when you just need to see some kind of light in your struggles. That is where I am right now and trying to get some of the strength that others seem to get from me.

Very frustrating!

@Avasad It is okay to cry and not force a smile all the time. You are right that keeping it in is not healthy. But don't let it consume you and keep you from finding positive things in your life. I know that isn't easy because I struggle with it. It might be as simple as looking at family, friends, shelter, being able to see and hear - simple things.  

Thank you very much and my prayers of hope may I send to you also. You are a good vessel of help.     -Mclluv

@dlannan3821 I can try............

@Avasad‍ , hi. I suffer from depression also. I see you and @dlannan3821‍  have had a nice discussion but I wanted to add a comment. Have you considered counseling? It really helps to have a trained professional and just a sympathetic ear for listening and sometimes great feedback that can help uncover root causes that help you understand where the depression is coming from. It can be a lonely road but a good psychologist can be very very helpful and a huge blessing. Sometimes it’s difficult to find a good one. I have found that often an older person with a lot of life experience can be helpful as they understand not only psychology but life itself. @dlannan3821‍  a good clergyman can offer this support too if requested and that’s free of cost if insurance is an issue or if you want to keep it private. My son suffers as I do and he explodes in rage often which can damage relationships.  It’s a heavy burden to carry I know but there are real live people out there who can help. 

@LynndMS Thank You so much!

I see a therapist, but she didn't diagnose me with depression. When I'm at therapy I don't act depressed. Idk why...

My parents wouldn't send me to a psychologist... nobody knows that I think I'm depressed. 

I hated my therapist. Now I don't see her cuz we took a two month break for summer...

Well you can lean on me anytime. 

Gosh, this is a great topic. Been years since I've had a truly great day. Most days I've had are just meh, boring or hold no interest to me at all.  Kinda sad sometimes when a movie I want to see finally comes out and that's my highlight for the month.  Or find out Amazon is having some mega giveaways...hehe. Wish for those times when everything was exciting and cool to me. When the world around me was colored in rainbow colors and not this gray drab color.  When saying hello to the Wal-Mart cashier, restaurant waitress, or even the drive through worker was a pleasant encounter and not some play between non emotional drones going through the motions.  When I used to interact with my neighbors instead of completely ignoring them.  Goodness, I'm rambling haha. 

I hope and wish something great and extraordinary happens to all of you at some point and leads you to have a great day.  Maybe get kidnapped by some awesome aliens that only want to make you laugh or be drafted by the government to go on a mission to save humanity by destroying Twinkies. Seriously, those things are evil agents of the dictator diabetes. Oh, rambling again....been on the look out for that good extraordinary day folks. Just might be around the corner ;)