How to start talking about depression?

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Patients Depression

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Hello, new here, I could use some advice...
I've been depressed for too long but being very shy and having trouble getting things off my chest, it seems impossible to talk about my depression to my family or to a doctor. I know it's not normal to live like this (work, running errands, housework... and nothing else!) No social life, and I don't want to have one either, even with my family. It may be hard to believe, but even my children don't give me the strength to go on. I no longer see any interest or desire. It's hopeless, I don't wish this on anyone... to feel alone despite my children who are there (still teenagers) and so sad inside while I smile in front of people... probably to avoid the questions I don't have the answers to and especially to avoid crying... I don't know what to do anymore.

Beginning of the discussion - 6/17/20

How to start talking about depression?
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@OnlyAmy Hi OnlyAmy, thank you for opening this discussion. Depression and mental health can be difficult to talk about as they are so deeply personal, but also because many of us were raised to not talk about our feelings. Let me tag some members who can maybe share with you:

Hi everyone, how are you today? emoticon cute  Did you have a hard time opening up and talking about your depression? How did you finally muster up the courage? Do you think more work needs to be done in our society to de-stigmatise mental health?
@Kimmer717@Ginn1961@SharonAlvarez@blisstine@Granni@Kbar1985@Missangiielee@Oweemytoe@Tournzero@LisaLisa@LillyLezzett@dyermm@Sirovy@Allison96@Vanhanna12@Dumplings@Rojothomas‍ 

Take care,
Courtney

How to start talking about depression?
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@OnlyAmy This is so important, thank you for bringing this up. I don't know about you, but I, to some extent and certainly my parents, were very much part of that "stiff upper lip" generation where talking about feelings was taboo and men especially weren't allowed to cry or else be considered weak. I totally understand. I think these ways are still very much ingrained in our society and there is still much research and work to be done to understand depression and mental health. Talking about how we feel is so so difficult.

Amy, you've taken the first and most important step by opening up to us here. Please please please, if you can, at least talk to your primary care doctor. He or she should be able to get the ball rolling for you and provide you with some resources and advice on medications or counseling. I know you may not feel like you can bear it anymore, but your children and your family need you, and you can only be there for them if you get some support yourself.

How to start talking about depression?
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@Courtney_J Hi, it was difficult to start talking about my depression. But when I was able to it became easier. I learned how to process the past so I don't have to keep reliving it every day. I am much better than I was but still a work in progress. 

How to start talking about depression?
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Hello. It was very difficult to talk about it, especially because I have bipolar and PTSD.    It has helped a little to talk about it but to someone who doesn’t know or experienced it is hard for them to understand.   Lately I am having extreme highs and lows and when I have the lows it’s bad.  Tuesday was one of the worst days I’ve had in a while. I literally cried all day and then later that day came the anger.  It was horrible.  

How to start talking about depression?
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Hi Amy, I have struggled with Depression for over 40 years now. I had undiagnosed and unmedicated  Major Depressive Disorder for 30 of those years. How different I often wonder what my life would be like if I had gotten help sooner. Like you ,I currently have a limited number of friends, very little interest in much of anything anymore and dealing with one major event in my life after another this past year starting with the sudden death of my best friend and soulmate a year ago to more recently the sudden loss of my job. I have lost everything time and time again. I have stared down the barrel of suicide and decided for whatever reason " not to today". No one in my family gets it. No one. I have been on this journey alone for the most part and yes I have a lot of bad days still despite being medicated and talking to a therapist, but I know I would be dead without at least those supports in my life. Long story short, you need to find someone, anyone, to talk to, for you.

How to start talking about depression?
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I recently had another bout with suicidal thoughts.   I am in the middle of a horrible divorce being left with a house he destroyed and a lot of debt .  I feel like a failure a lot of the time .  I lost my job after 20 years and am now living with my boyfriend and his family   It’s difficult sometimes because he lost his wife in a car accident and has 2 kids.  I love the family and they love me but we struggle sometimes because his daughter is still struggling with it and she has a lot of issues herself.   I struggle everyday with self worth severely and think often of why I am alive.  I feel a lot that no one would miss me 

How to start talking about depression?

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I recently had another bout with suicidal thoughts.   I am in the middle of a horrible divorce being left with a house he destroyed and a lot of debt .  I feel like a failure a lot of the time .  I lost my job after 20 years and am now living with my boyfriend and his family   It’s difficult sometimes because he lost his wife in a car accident and has 2 kids.  I love the family and they love me but we struggle sometimes because his daughter is still struggling with it and she has a lot of issues herself.   I struggle everyday with self worth severely and think often of why I am alive.  I feel a lot that no one would miss me 

How to start talking about depression?

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@jasmine1092 @LillyLezzett @dyermm @Oweemytoe Thank you all for replying, I think just getting it out there that I'm struggling and need help did a lot of good. I think I've spent so much time trying to be strong that it's hard to access and open up and spill everything out. Not sure that makes sense. I'm going to look for some help because I can't keep on like this. Thank you all again.

How to start talking about depression?

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@dyermm Oh no, I'm so sorry to hear about what you're going through.  You are not a failure! You seem like a kind person to me and I know that mean a lot to everyone in your life, so you would definitely be missed. Stay strong, you can get through this.