Topic of the discussion
Posted on 2/2/20 9:50 AM
I was diagnosed with endometrial carcinoma in october 2019. I have had multiple rounds of chemo. I chose not to have a hysterectomy yet because my spouse and i are hoping to have a child.
Since starting treatment my SO complains that i am no longer affectionate. I didnt realize that i wasnt as cuddly or physical with him.
I have lost all of my hair. Am down to 85 pounds and just found out i will need more chemo and a surgery.
Is it normal to feel detached, less affectionate, not wanting to be touched as much and not feel any sexual interest? He is taking it personally.
I love him very much and would like to try to show him that. By understanding if this is treatment related.
I have also been suffering from anxiety and depression since diagnosis. Along with still trying to raise the 3 children we have (ages 8, 7, and 4)
Any input, advice or links would be much appreciated!!
Beginning of the discussion - 2/11/20Is it normal to feel emotionally detached/depressed after chemo? https://www.carenity.us/forum/cancer/living-with-cancer/is-this-normal-1517
Posted on 2/11/20 5:53 PM
@EmilyRose I think it's normal. When I had chemo, lost my hair, lost a lot of weight, my image of myself was shattered. I didn't feel sexy or desirable. I couldn't look at myself in the mirror. Add to that the fear of death and all romance and affection went out the window. I think you need to talk to him about how you're feeling and let him know that it's not about him. You just had a brush with death and he needs to be patient.
Also, if I were you I would get into counselling and maybe couples counselling too. My husband went willingly and it did us a lot of good to get everything out in the open. I hope you're ok.
Posted on 3/2/20 7:40 PM
First of all, God Bless you for your strength. I was diagnosed with Rectal cancer about 7 months ago..I'm on #10 of 12 chemo treatments, and it's awful. I am also like you, and thousands of other people feeling the same things. We have nuclear chemicals in our bodies that invade every cell good and bad. I feel like I'm beside the real me for now, so I cry over anything, I've also kept alot on as I still want to be good wife, and super Mom...I have a wonderful husband who has had to understand that as a woman, I just don't feel sexy right now, but I will again, and If you can just hold me, and be supportive, and know what these foreign chemicals do to a mind, body, and soul, We are grateful to have it, and also hate it at the same time. Have your husband read some about this process called cancer and treatment. It helped my husband to better understand what I go through. I just want to send you a loving hug, and tell you I'm so proud of you for being so strong! You are going to get your life back, you are not alone. Talk to someone who can give you some tools to navigate through. Those children need you, and know its okay to ask friends, family for help with them. I'm rambling, but just hope you know I'm right there with you suster!!! xoxo, Tina