Self Introduction + would like advice
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Hey, just wanted to intro myself. I was diagnosed with invasive ductile carcinoma stage 1A about a month and a half ago. I had a lumpectomy with lymph node testing done on October 16th. And for those of you that are very observant, YES, that was on my 52nd birthday. All went well, how could it not, it was was my b-day. But now I just feel like I’m falling apart. My emotions are everywhere and I feel angry and anxious ALL the time. You see, my mom was diagnosed with stage 1 lung cancer in April and had her lower left lobe removed on May 31st of this year. So she keeps telling me she knows what I’m going through. But the thing is, she doesn’t! And here’s the kicker, I can’t tell her that because I don’t want to diminish her cancer. But hers was not so personal and hormonal. She doesn’t understand how I don’t want her in my appointments because I’m exposed. She gets angry at me. ANY ADVICE WOULD BE WONDERFUL!!!
Lastly about me, I live with my elderly parents to help take care of them, and my 33 year old son lives with us and has mental health issues. I also have a 30 year old daughter who has 2 girls, 5 and 6 years old and lives with her fiancé and his three kids. (Boy 12, girl 10, and boy 7)
How are you today?
Thank you for introducing yourself and sharing your story. Welcome to Carenity 😊
As you have stated, it can be hard to find the balance between find connection, making someone feel less alone, but also to recognize individual struggle. I am sure other Carenity members share your frustration. I will tag a few to see if they can offer you any advice for your delicate situation.
@Leez1956 @Catspirit @Acwright @Janice547 @Musicman @Donna81 @mcoukart @Lisafoster68 @Pattynewport @MikeGarr @CandyBar @Dawnrenee @Jflores3 @Reese68$ @Nurse1963 @Faith7150 @Bbbecki78 @Bridgetbauman @clare2457 @Casamid @SonyaJ01 @Debbie1612 @Mema6-2023 @MHerrin @Samsthetwin @Firefly77 @Jaya345 @Marcyp3 @kathysart @PattyWells @shawndabr @Frankdaddy40 @Canderson @Suebarchowski @Sully57 @Jen816 @francesmoogan @Judygarb @Mplamb1967 @Ruby3512 @LearntoFly @Skittles1956 @Julie14 @Jbevanisko @Cassie @Rbcmd72
Introduce yourself and give @Orangie1 some advice as to how she should handle her situation.
Lizzi from the Carenity team
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You have alot on your plate and it doesn't sound like you get anytime for yourself! Also, you don't seem to have a chance to be heard/ listened too. It's no wonder your emotions are all over the place. Since it looks like your family may not be your best support system do you have any friends you can share your experience with? If you don't have a good support system you need to seek professional help. If that's not for you I've found this web site as well as blogs that have people going thru the same challenges as you to be very therapeutic. I have stage 4 Renal Cell Cancer. Several years ago my mom who had Dementia needed 24/7 care. My sister came to live with her thinking she could handle it. We found out very quickly, the kind of care she needed was going to be professional memory care. It became my responsibility to find her Financial aid, secure a good home and do it quickly. It totally wiped me out both mentally and physically. My sister ended up moving in with and stayed for 9 months until my mom finally passed. While I get along and love her dearly, living with her and dealing with all of her emotions every day became very challenging and added to the stress I was already going thru. It was even harder for my wife who had to listen to both of us every day. I'm very fortunate I have 4 grown children with 5 grandchildren who are wonderful. They stepped in and really helped us out from a support system. So, I know how you feel when you have such pressure and stress around you 24/7. You must find an outlet for yourself or your going to have continued emotional challenges. Good luck!
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Thomas F Stokes
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