Feeling like my world is spinning out of control

you arent alone. it's okay to need help and not be okay. you dont have to punish yourself for things you cant help. you arent alone.

 if you are looking for new skills check therapistaid.com for worksheets and there are lots of other free online resources. instagram and pinterest also have posts about mental health, mindfulness, and recovery (as well as possibly an understanding community). if you have a kindle (or download the app on your phone) lookup free books mental health on amazon and you will find some good stuff. the app store also has a lot of mental health apps for anxiety, depression, ptsd, bipolar, bpd, gratitude, mood tracking, panic disorder. I like moodtools it has a safety plan in case you are suicidal. want free counseling? check out the app or website 7cups of tea for a personalized treatment plan and access to free counseling 24/7 and also some online therapy (may cost money I've never used it). other apps for community: we are more, unmasked mental health, talklife. I hope these help somewhat, best of luck with everything.

Hey, I'm just scared my disorder will get out of hand and then end up in the hospital again.

@Noah2142 even if you do have to to to the hospital ita okay as long as it helps you and keeps you safe so you can recover. I know the pain can be unbearable to the point of wanting to die. yes, death is the absence or pain- but also of joy and love, dreams coming true, and falling in love with yourself. keep fighting for the light!