How can we learn to love ourselves?
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Ok yeah I have been living with depression for 30 years now so help me stop. Give me a reason to go on let me help you please. It’s the only cure I know really get involved with helping someone else and feel just a bit less sad because we only get depressed because no one cares about us right? So we can only stop it by caring about someone else right? I don’t know I’m only guessing but it feels right because I have never cared about myself yet I have cared so deeply about people I have only just met. Why is that? Are you the same how do we love ourselves? Please reach out to me and save me by letting me try to save you.
Hello @ShadowSlayerOFA, thank you for opening this discussion. Let me tag some other members who can possibly share with you.
Hi everyone, what do you think? Does helping others help you to cope with your depression? How do you think we can learn to love ourselves better?
@paulsarahwin @bpower3 @jordanknox @JohnQP @badbunny @slimurray @Nayeli @Sanders154 @djspada @nathalie @Kaykay559 @Yeratava @Kdav80 @MSimmons1123 @IENWOXM19M @leahisher @James38063 @Tanishabarella
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Courtney_J, Community Manager, Carenity US
Just going through a bad time and I don’t know what to do. I’m madly in love with my fiancé but she’s so damn stubborn that she won’t allow me to step in when things are bad. I love her more than life but I don’t know if I’m able to be shut out anymore.
She has an ex that won’t stop harassing her. He’s a big guy that no doubt could stomp me in the dirt but I don’t care. I adore her and her kids (who seem to like me a whole lot too) but I don’t know if I’m just setting myself up to be hurt more. The thought of losing her kills me.
I’m just so lost right now.
@Courtney_J @ShadowSlayerOFA Yeah I get that, by focusing on other people you don't have to feel what you're feeling and deal with your own stuff. I guess you could try to flip the thing on it's head... How do you think the people you help feel when you help them? Probably pretty good and cared for, right? Why don't you deserve the same thing? You do, so try to help yourself too or lean on others and get them to help you too. Idk if that makes any sense at all.
@JohnQP That's great that you have such strong feelings for her, it sounds like she and her kids are lucky to have a guy like you. Has she tried to get the ex to back off herself?
Yes she went off on him. It was impressive. I’m just insecure
I don’t know what I’d do without her. I think I’d rather die.
@ShadowSlayerOFA No, there's many causes for depression. Feelings of care to new people are normal, trust me we are all familiar with it. At this time, it certainly can seem hard to find a reason to live. At one point, I convinced myself that there wasn't one. But, I'm sure you're sick of hearing this, but the point of life is to live it. A lot of getting happy is FINDING THINGS that make you happy. As long as you stay away from substances and abusable habits, it's easy to find something to devote yourself to. You may not see yourself saying this now, but in time you'll be looking at the past and say "Wow, after all that I can't believe I'm happy now." Whether or not you have the energy, just take baby steps into doing research on hobbies and maybe even pick up some old talents. Everything takes time, I know it's one of the hardest struggles you'll get through, but the happiness after is so bliss.
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