Patients Behavioural disorders / Mental illness
Is anyone else struggling with PTSD?
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So I watched my friend shoot hisself in the head 3 years ago, & everything just keep getting worse , his brother thought we killed him but then he stopped who knows he might still believe it but now I think his family out to kill me, I stay ready but ion want to kill nobody, my anger got out of control , I push my friends away, they’re scared of me, one told me sometimes he think I might kill him, & others told me I need to be in a mental hospital & I’ve thought about it but that’s practically like jail, I won’t open up to no bitch nomore cause the one I did left ,so they always juss leave , I’m running out of people that fuck wit me, it’s like I push everybody away , at first I thought everybody else was just changing but I was wrong , my sleep be fucked up anymore too , when I’m not paranoid if someone’s gonna break in my house & slaughter my family , when I do close my eyes I still hear my friend drowning on his own blood dying on my floor , like do I needa be in a hospital , is they somebody that understand me?
I struggle with depression, anxiety, social anxiety, panic attacks and an addiction to self harm...
@Wasato Hey, it sounds like you're really going through something. It sounds like PTSD to me, but I'm obviously not a doctor or anything. Do you have anyone you can talk to about it? I can't imagine how hard it must have been to see that happen to your friend.
I struggle everyday with my PTSD but I some how have found a way to get through each day. I have childhood and some adulthood trauma that is so hard to talk about. And I don't always know how to tell anyone I am having a bad day and if they are going to understand or not. And sometimes I get scared that if I tell them I see something that I know it isn't there because its part of my flashbacks and that they are going to judge me. I don't know why my interself judges myself that bad. And if it is normal for someone with PTSD to do that to themself.
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